Monday, May 3, 2010

musings, updates, thoughts, windy days...

i'm sneaky practicing my facilitation skills lately on my YMCA kids.
i'm actually pretty excited about it- this is the most diverse developmental age range i believe i've ever facilitated teambuilding type activities for. (K-5th grade)
they love it, and it's starting to change them. it's amazing how being consistent on just a few things over the past month has produced some awesome changes in those kids, from insisting they say "please" and "thank you" to the way they approach doing homework. this job is a unique learning experience for sure.
i think this entire time in my life is unique- but then again, so has most of my life since college. i sort of love my life.
though i will admit i'm already feeling that familiar itch to figure out "what's next". but only because i'm so used to searching. obviously i don't see myself working at the YMCA before/after school position i'm in now for the rest of my life, i am sort of setting the goal to stay here a year though. we'll see how that goes. i was pretty set on it until i started feeling that familiar aching to take an outward bound course. there is one in the pacific northwest this fall... it's 50 days and $6000. if i could get a scholarship to pay for half i might be able to do it. but only maybe. and part of it is the money, the other big part is my body- my back and i have not been best friends lately. partly because i'm trying to avoid taking painkillers. i just want my back to stop hurting. ugh.

when people ask me what i want to do with the rest of my life i really don't know what to tell them. i'm happy here now. sometimes i want to think about "someday", but most days, i'm content living in the wonder that is today.

i'm thankful for each thing i've learned at each stage of my unpredictable life. i appreciate seeing each lesson play out tangibly and beautifully before my very eyes. even just now, as i was typing, holed up in my room for the first time since i've lived down here in the basement, and murphy came in and we spent the last half hour chatting. (though she made me go outside... it's cold out there!) i remember making a promise to myself to strive to put relationships in a higher priority in my life. even when that makes my calculated life a little less comfortable. i am, in many ways, quite an introvert.

in summation, i have no idea what beautiful portrait the landscape of my life will be when all is said and done. all i know is i want it to be said of me that i loved Jesus and loved others, wholeheartedly, unselfishly, recklessly.

grace and peace to you this day.

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